Some men were born heroes... It wasn't these guys.
2017-03-04
N/A
90 min
Three inept night watchmen, aided by a young rookie and a fearless tabloid journalist, fight an epic battle to save their lives. A mistaken warehouse delivery unleashes a horde of hungry vampires, and these unlikely heroes must not only save themselves but also stop the scourge that threatens to take over the city of Baltimore.
Horrible watch, will not watch again, and recommend you actively avoid.
I'm not even sure this one would make a good Bad Movie Night.
It's essentially a bunch of jokes written with the concept of normalcy happening in a completely crazy situation just strung together.
The jokes are mediocre at best, the cast isn't great, and it's a minimal production budget. Even if the budget was better, I'm not sure the vision is of quality.
This is allegedly a "vampire" movie, and after Twilight, I didn't think I could be upset at vampires in a different way, but this movie found it: just treat them like zombies.
This is literally a "fast zombie" / infected movie, but instead, they call them vampires because they can't handle sunlight.
I have a very long statement about what vampires were, what they've become, what they mean, and what they should be, but honestly this movie isn't worth it here in this review.
Just avoid it, unless you've run out of zombie movies to watch.
