When all else fails, they don't.
2009-08-03
$175.0M
118 min
From the Egyptian desert to deep below the polar ice caps, the elite G.I. JOE team uses the latest in next-generation spy and military equipment to fight the corrupt arms dealer Destro and the growing threat of the mysterious Cobra organization to prevent them from plunging the world into chaos.
Entertaining in parts but a mess of a plot with some shoddy visual effects even by 2009 standards. Some stunt work was alright but nothing that really stands out and none of the cast really were all that memorable. Did appreciate some of the nods to the cartoons but otherwise just very forgettable. 2.75/5
People like me were waiting for a GI Joe movie for decades. It was instead kind of a hack that could have been any other movie.
I don't think that the distaste came from the fact that the movie could never live up to memories of childhood play. I think that the distaste came from the knoweldge that Larry Hama had decades of fun and wonderful stories to tell, he had written an entire little universe... and the movie was nothing like it.
It hardly even resembled the cartoon.
